on January 30, 2008
I think I need to change my room around. I realize you have never seen my room nor do you care where I put my furniture, but stay with me. I’m a person who needs to feel in control. (Notice I say “to feel in control” because I’m not stupid enough to think anyone is really *in* control.) And I need organization, a minimal amount of clutter, to feel in control. I’m not a neat freak, my shelves are dusty, but I am having more and more trouble dealing with clutter the older I get. To be honest, I’m becoming more anal. So not good.
I’ve let things get out of hand. It seems like no matter how much crap I throw away, more appears. Where does this shit come from? It’s giving me anxiety attacks and those are just not fun for me. Call me crazy.
So, the other night when I couldn’t fall asleep (for the umpteenth time though I’m exhausted), I realized I need to change things up. If I move things around then I have to clean up the clutter. Maybe even eliminate some. So that’s the plan. I need to take back control over my *stuff* in order to get rid of the anxiety which is the only way I’m going to get unstuck in the writing.
Yeah, did I mention this all has to do with the writing? I’m not lucky enough to have an extra room I can use as an office so my desk and comp are in my room. It’s plenty big enough but I’m tired of looking at that darn wall. I need light – natural light. So the desk is going between the windows. That should help. And I’m clearing off all the clutter that has nothing to do with writing and it just taking up space.
What do you think? Would a shake up do me good? Or am I fooling myself? What do you do when you need a change? And please tell me I’m not the only one with multiplying clutter.