For a person trying to write a book by the end of the summer, you would think this would be a good thing. Nope. I can’t even make myself open the file at this point. The more e-courses and workshops I take, the more I realize that I suck at this. Deep POV, active vs. passive, creating conflict, creating real characters and dialogue. Who the hell was I trying to fool thinking I could do any of that?
I tried to apply the active vs. passive voice to the chapter I’m working on right now. It took the entire day and I managed to do nothing but delete the dreck that I couldn’t figure out how to fix. I actually made the damn thing shorter and I think worse. You cannot (read: I cannot) write a book without using the word “was”. Just can’t do it. At a workshop I attended over the weekend someone asked the question, “but you can write a book using passive voice can’t you?” to which the response was, “sure but no one will want to read it.” It was like someone took a giant pin to my balloon.
But then I said to hell with all of them I’m just going to write as I was. I have no problem trying to make the writing better but I can’t write with nothing in mind than seeking out and destroying all the passive voice. So today, when I had the entire afternoon and I’m almost falling asleep, I managed to get the flash drive out of the purse. But I can’t make myself put it in the computer. I feel like a little kid that crosses her arms, pushes out her bottom lip and says, “You can’t make me.”
How about you? Ever feel like giving up? Just chucking it all into the garbage (or recycle bin) and saying to hell with it all? And how the hell am I ever going to get this done? At this rate, I won’t have it done by the end of next summer nevermind the end of this one!